Well! It's been a few weeks since my last post and that's because we've had a crazy September welcoming our second beautiful boy, baby Toby, into our lives and hearts.
I don't know where to start other than to firstly give you both a rundown of Toby's birthday (and the days leading up to it). So, unlike Matt's birth, I was adamant that this time, so long as there were no medical issues preventing it, I would wait for spontaneous labour and attempt a VBAC (vaginal birth after caesarean). Toby, your due date was 22 August and that came and went with nothing exciting to report. Then a week later, after receiving many a text message on the daily from people wanting to know where you were, I started to feel period-like pains at about 10:30pm. I downloaded an app on my phone that allowed me to track how long they were lasting for a lo and behold, they were coming every ten minutes or so. So I went and woke your dad up just to let him know that finally, I was in labour.
I knew the best thing to do at this point was to rest, so after tracking the contractions for a little while longer I then headed to bed. I managed to get some sleep that night and when I woke up in the morning the contractions were still coming, but hadn't increased in frequency or severity. I had an appointment booked for that morning with Peta anyway and I asked your dad to stay home from work (he was due to start his leave the following day regardless). Matt we also kept you home from kindy which you loved.
So Peta arrived and we updated her on what had been happening. She checked all the usual things such as blood pressure, urine (for protein), your heart rate Toby etc. and was very positive. She said my aim was to try and get into established labour, where I'd experience consistent, close, intense contractions, so suggested we go for a walk. So after she left we walked up to the local IGA and had a play at the playground to try and get things moving.
Unfortunately by that evening they weren't coming any closer together, but had at least improved slightly in intensity. I went to bed and would wake up for a contraction, get through it and the pass out, only to have the cycle repeat itself with the next contraction 5-10 minutes later. When I woke up the next morning Peta checked in with me. After much discussion throughout the day I agreed to have a stretch and sweep to try and get myself into active labour, so Peta came over and performed this in the afternoon. By this point I have been labouring for close to 48 hours. She let me know that I had dilated to about 3-4cm, which was promising, and at least we had a standard by which to measure any further progress.
That night (Thursday night) at about 10pm I was experiencing quite an intense contraction and yelled out to your dad as I was having a lot of trouble getting through it. As I yelled out, I felt a big stream of water and realised my waters had broken, all over the bed. Matt, you were asleep on the bed at the time (thankfully on the other side!) and your dad and I quickly checked to see if there was any meconium on the waters (baby poo, which is a sign of distress in some cases). We rang Peta who recommended we come into the hospital due to the meconium, so that I could labour there while Toby's heart-rate could be monitored. Your dad and I were fine with this, so we rang Ma Ma and Gramps to come over and stay at the house with Matt (who hadn't woken through any of this) while your dad and I headed in to King Eddies.
On the way in my waters broke again in the car (and we'd forgotten to bring a towel to put down on the car seat!) so I rocked up to reception with a very wet bum! Peta met us in there and we were taken to the labour ward for monitoring.
I wish I could say at this point that things progressed, but unfortunately for the next ten or eleven hours things stayed much the same, and by the point I'd been labouring for two and a half days. I laboured through this third night however by 10am it was becoming apparent that Toby may be in distress, as every time I experienced a contraction, his heart-rate would drop to a not-so-good level (below 110 is not good, and at one point it was as low as 60 beats per minute). Peta was really keen to try and do anything to get me into established labour and I was physically exhausted so around 10am we agreed to give me a morphine shot so that I could relax, hopefully get some sleep and allow my body to just take over and bring on established labour. The morphine was sweet relief and your dad and I both got a few hours of sleep (albeit interrupted).
Unfortunately when I woke up things hadn't improved and at this stage I was starting to get worried about Toby. I was still only 3-4cm dilated and knew things weren't moving along as they were meant to, there was the issue of Toby's decelerations and the ongoing potential problem of the meconium (if this is ingested it can cause a host of issues). So, despite planning this day for almost four years and praying for a VBAC birth, we made the call to give birth by caesarean. I knew in my heart that it was wrong to continue labouring when it was clear my body wasn't going to get into established labour any time soon and Toby's heart-rate was dropping further and further and taking longer and longer to recover. I cried, and am still sad about it, but it was the right decision. We were dealt shitty circumstances but had exhausted every safe avenue to try and have a vaginal birth. So while sad, I have no regrets..
...because we were soon to meet our beautiful baby boy! We headed down to surgery, I had the epidural inserted and surgery began. Luckily Peta was there and she made sure all the things on our caesarean birth plan took place, such as delayed cord clamping, having the curtain lowered and having bub placed directly on my chest so that we had skin to skin for as long as possible. Unlike with Matt (sorry to say), the moment I saw you Toby, I instantly fell in love. You came out crying, happy and healthy, and I was filled with utter joy at the sight of you. I contribute this to having laboured for so long and experiencing all those good hormones of labour, which unfortunately I never experienced with Matt's birth.
You lay on my chest for a long time and I was so pleased you had finally joined us, at 2:14pm, on the day I'd predicted all along, 1 September 2017, ten days past your due date. You were here.
I was then stitched up, we were taken to recovery, you had your first breastfeed and we were then taken to a hospital room where I realised you weren't a Patrick! I wasn't sure what your name was, and it wasn't until the next day that we decided your name was Toby Neil Keene.
Your grandparents, aunty and big brother visited you that night and it so lovely to watch siblings meet each other for the first time. I was so happy to see my boys together.
I'm sure I'll have more to add soon, but given I've got two beautiful young boys to look after I'd better wrap it up here for today.
Toby, thank you for joining us my sweet boy. You are so loved.
Love,
Mum xxx
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